“Deliver me, O Lord, from lying lips and from the deceitful tongue.”

Psalm 120 is written by an exiled person living in the midst of a foreign and warring civilization. The psalmist expresses deep desire for inner peace due to the things being said about them; they are tormented by the tongues of others around them. By talking to God about this, the psalmist seeks peace. And finds it.

This hit me in two ways.

First, the obvious. It hurts when people demean me. I don’t enjoy hearing about all my many faults from others—I don’t think anyone does. Some people will say they ‘don’t care what other people think’, yet I have to wonder at the veracity of that claim. At some level, I think all of us experience pain from first or secondhand disparagement. Being in a place of leadership, I willingly accept that this will always be the case. Show me a leader, I’ll show you someone who is judged and whose actions are often questioned. That’s life. However, it should not be this way with those who say they love you. With those who say they love me.

Now, the second part.

How often are our tongues instruments of destruction rather than purveyors of peace? We aren’t perfect. But is this an overused excuse? I watch as people around me tear others down; I hear it. I am guilty of it at points, too. What we say can hurt someone so much more than any other physical action could emulate. My nose will heal if its broken; my heart takes longer to mend from emotional damage.

Jesus calls us by name with a gentle voice. He uses his tongue to impart the word of God and speaks truth in love. We often speak our truth; the harsh reality is that we forget the love part. Even couched in ‘inclusivity’, the Episcopal Church is guilty of shaming those who disagree, those who hold differing beliefs on what Jesus means to them. Is it our job to call them to the carpet, demeaning them and stripping them of their humanity with our words? Or is it our job to listen and then disagree with our actions of love rather than our words of hurt?

I wonder how many times I have been the psalmist from 120. I wonder how many times I have been the people to which they are referring. I hope to be better. I hope that this day will be better than yesterday in terms of my interactions. I pray that I live into the mantra I say every day. “Lord open my lips, and my mouth shall proclaim your praise.” I hope you find wisdom in what I’ve written and ask that for yourself. Remember, we are not just the hands and feet of Jesus. We are his mouthpieces in the world. What we say, and how we say it, matters. Let your words be of love, not hate; of unity and not division. Let your hearts speak, your tongues follow, and your lives be dedicated to being the disciples we all desire to be.

Faithfully,

Fr. Sean+